Have you ever wondered what it might be like to suddenly have it all and then give it all away? Diane Johnson did just that. After her husband died in a mid-air aircraft collision, she was awarded the largest payout in history from the state of California to look after her and her six children. The money afforded her freedoms and luxuries which she enjoyed, but over time she has given away almost everything she’s bought away. Eventually the money ran out, and where she once lived a luxurious life, Diane now has nothing. Here she talks to her daughter Leigh about the highs and lows of having it all.
Leigh: How did your childhood and your mother influence your attitude to clothes?
Diane: At a very young age I wanted much better quality than my mother could afford. My father died when I was 12, leaving my mother to figure out how to support us. I used to see all the clothes and items that my friends had from their wealthy families. We lived in Forest Hills, a nice community in Queens, but you know, I didn’t have the funds and my mother didn’t have the funds to buy me the things I always wanted. So I used to save my babysitting money so I could buy one good thing. I just always liked good quality. Unfortunately, I liked it so much now I’m in a dilemma where I don’t have the money that I used to have. Anyway, that is OK.
You had five young children and your husband died in a mid-air plane crash. You found out you were pregnant with the sixth child – me – a month after the crash. Did your relationship to possessions change after he died?
I realised that I was on the cusp of getting a huge award because of the crash, and I could buy anything I wanted for myself or my children, and I didn’t have to go ask him for money any more. My whole world opened up. That’s what happened. When I did get money I went a little crazy, you know. I could go buy a $3,000 dress or $5,000 coat without batting an eyelash. But that was something I always wanted. Let’s face it. Money is freedom, you know?
Do you think buying excessively has anything to do with all the loss you’ve experienced? Like filling all those holes?
If I delve into the psychological and emotional meaning of it, I’m sure it is all connected. When I walk into a store, no matter how down I’m feeling that day, I get this elevated sense of being happy. There’s something about getting in the store and walking down the aisles, even if I can’t buy anything these days. It is sort of unfortunate. I actually thought about that the other day: if I go shopping, I’m much happier.
Did the emotional value towards objects change after you experienced so much loss?
When they came to interview me after I got the largest award in the history of California, I remember saying on television that the money could never make up for the loss of my husband. But it gave me the absolute freedom to pursue the things I always wanted: travelling, moving, buying a home, good education for my children, good clothes, anything.
You’ve always been very generous. You gave me, at a very young age, a lot of your hand-me-downs which weren’t exactly “Hand-me-downs”; they were Chanel, Louis Vuitton and a lot of other designer clothes and bags. Unfortunately, I was very young when you gave most of the good stuff away and I missed out. But I have three of your Chanel bags and I’m sure my sisters have a few too. When you started to not be able to afford them any longer, I gave one back to you – do you remember?
Part of the handle was falling off. I brought it in to get fixed at a Chanel shop and they told me how much, I went ahead and said go ahead and fix it but I didn’t have the money to pick it up. I never picked it up.
Was there – or is there – a limit to your giving away?
Well, not when it comes to my children, but there’s a limit now because I don’t have much any more.
But when you had a lot?
No, I remember giving my nail therapist $3,000 as she was having a hard time. And now I could use that $3,000.
You love to buy new things. Sometimes I feel a new dress from Kmart is more exciting than an old Valentino dress in your closet. What is it about the new?
Well, I don’t think that statement is correct. I think I’d prefer to have my old Valentino than something from Kmart, believe me.
But you like new things? And you get rid of everything and replace them with new things.
It’s about reinventing myself, changing how I want to look. Every six months, nine months, I think, oh, why did I buy that? Because it’s not the look I want any more.
Why do you like to get rid of the old things?
It’s a cleansing. I just got rid of two thirds of my wardrobe, stuff that I hadn’t worn in years or wouldn’t wear. It’s a great feeling. It’s a cleansing feeling.
What did you do with the clothes?
I gave them to my boyfriend. He runs some restaurants and he said there are a lot of Mexicans and South Americans that are dishwashers and other things that don’t make much money. So, I filled up four huge bags of shoes and clothes.
Do you miss anything?
My beautiful South Sea pearls that I paid $25,000 for and sold for five. And I miss belonging to a club because I can’t pay the dues anymore. I’m social, and I like club life. I like sitting at the cocktail lounge and having a drink and talking to people. I like the community of a club. I miss the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club and even the club in Florida that I belonged to. I feel like I’m by myself more than I’ve ever been and that’s not me – I like people.
Is there anything you’d like to buy right now?
Yes, a Cartier tri gold ring.
If you could retrieve one thing from the past, what would it be?
A pair of beautiful jade pearls that my husband bought me when we were very young visiting San Francisco, one of the two things he bought me. I saw the exact same ones on Nancy Pelosi the other night at the Democratic Convention on television.
I thought, oh, those are the ones I had. I don’t know what happened to them. I lost most of my jewellery. They were a beautiful-coloured blue. They were three or four hundred bucks in those days. Anyway, I’d like those back.
Is there anything that you own that you will never get rid of?
My diamond earrings. It is the one piece of jewellery that keeps me kind of thinking that I still have something that is beautiful and makes me look good, from a different strata.
A reminder that you could still be rich.
Exactly.
What is the most valuable lesson you ever learned?
To listen to people that are smarter than I am and take their advice. People kept boring me with financial advice. I’m not a good listener. I don’t take advice very well. If I had lived as frugally as I live now, I’d still be a multi-millionaire.
But you still don’t listen to anyone?
Nope.
Mom, you have a little shopping devil inside of you saying yes, yes, yes.
I’m sure I had a big devil inside me. But I think that devil inside me keeps me alive and vibrant. And I’m always thinking of how to reinvent myself. I wake up every morning and think, what can I do today that will be different and keep me young and vibrant? I think the most important trait I have is resilience. It makes you accept your life and keeps you in a good state of mind. Life goes up and down and you have to accept what comes. I lost four babies before my first child. To be resilient is almost everything and I am very resilient.
If your house was burning down, what three things would you save?
My dog, my earrings, nothing else is that important. I have boxes and boxes of the kids’ stuff, but I wouldn’t risk my life for memorabilia.
You live less than a mile from where your mother spent the latter part of her life and died – a place you swore you would never end up. You bought her a nice house that you would probably like to be living in now. And you share very similar shopping habits to her. Let’s face it, you are both semi shopping addicts. Looking back, do you have any regrets?
All right, let’s see. OK, I regret not having regrets.
No regrets.
My biggest regret is that I couldn’t save my daughter Lindsay. She died, and I really never found out what she died of. I feel blessed now because I have what the doctor said was almost perfect health at my age, which is very unusual. I have a young boyfriend who is adorable and interesting and the sex is great. I have my children and I have my grandchildren, so I can’t really say that I’m unhappy. I’m pretty happy with what I have, a lot more than some people. You evolve and evolve and then it gets to the point where you kind of decide this is going to be my life. I was young and enjoyed it – I had a great life, I could buy anything, I looked good, got my hair done, nails done, I travelled, bought clothes, gave my kids everything I wanted, bought anything I wanted… When you get to my age, which is old, you start appreciating the smaller things in life.
